Healing unworthiness can be easier than we actually realize. Guilt and shame are offshoots of our feeling unworthy. We all feel unworthy - but it shows up in different ways. Some of us are workaholics from our unworthy wounds, others of us have eating disorders. We all have it. In this podcast, you will learn how to heal that unworthiness, shame and guilt that runs your life!

Hi, I'm Dr. Divi, host of the podcast "Ease into Clarity." I'm a family doctor turned yoga teacher turned intuitive coach. I've been coaching and using intuition for over 13 years. I help people with daily life problems using intuition and emotions in the mind. In this podcast, you will hear from me weekly, where I will share life tools, life skills, life techniques, and intuition to help you with your daily challenges. Everyone's got it.

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Dr. Divi 00:07
Hi, welcome to the podcast Ease Into Clarity on Dr. Divi Family Doctor Turn intuitive coach, and I'm here to help you. In this podcast, we will learn mental techniques, emotional techniques, and spiritual techniques to change daily problems. So maybe it's your husband, your boss or co-worker, or your kid, they're driving you crazy. You can email me any of your questions, and I will use all the techniques I've learned over the years and help you grab your hot chocolate and make sure to subscribe. We'll see you soon. Ciao.

Dr. Divi 00:46
Hello, and welcome to the podcast, Dr. Divi's podcast ease into clarity. So this topic is called unworthiness, shame and guilt and how to heal that big one. And I'm gonna try to do it all in 10 to 15 minutes. So let's play together. Go to close your eyes. And if you're driving, obviously, don't close your eyes. Take a few breaths in and out. slow breath in. Long breath out. deep breath and slow breaths. And just be present. Inhale and exhale, belly rises and belly falls. Take a few more slow deep breaths and and long deep breaths out. And the next key is see if you can make the exhales a little bit longer than the inhales. So inhale, maybe for the count of four. Exhale, maybe for the kind of five after four or five cycles that whenever you're ready, gently open your eyes coming back. Welcome back. So this podcast needs some visuals. Now I know my podcast channel doesn't have visuals and you're probably driving your car listening to this. So I'll describe it my hands. If you're watching this on YouTube, you'll be able to see it when I hit Share Screen. But today we're talking about unworthiness, shame and guilt. But the first one to talk about is unworthiness. Because shame and guilt are offshoots. And you'll see where I'm going with this in a second. When I first got into self development, you know, I got into yoga and was like 2930, I was quite ill, as you may know from my TEDx talk, and got into yoga by accident. And then about a year or two later, I ended up in my first self development class, I was going through marital separation, and I felt like my life was falling apart. Prior to that my entire life was geared towards becoming a doctor, you may have heard the story as about five years old. I don't know if I was told I was gonna become a doctor or I decided I was gonna be a doctor who knows. But from that age of about five or six, I was be like to be a doctor. I was 19 years old, and I got into medical school. So it doesn't shock anyone when I tell them I fell apart when I was 28. I got married when I was 28. As well to a man I had met my residency, great guy. But a year after we got married 2829 is when I fell apart. So it shouldn't shock anybody because my whole life was very much geared towards one thing. And I moved out west and I thought I had everything in the world, love of my life, everything but had not worked once on my emotions. In that first self development class I took I discovered through the social element course, that one of my main stories in my head was I'm not good enough that please remember, this is pre internet, pre social media. And I think internet was just coming out but or correct me I could be wrong about that. But social this is way before social media. And I had never heard of the concept of I'm not good enough. I had never heard of it. And I was late 20s, early 30s discovering that I had this thought in my head. And seeing that it ran so many areas of my life from my work, to exercise to body image, and I didn't really realize it. And then we became consciously real aware of it. And this cellphone, of course, I was taking did not talk about spirit at all. It was all mind based, which is fine. But I literally and I'm not joking or lying when I say this, I literally cried for seven days, almost right.

Dr. Divi 04:10
I'll stop crying when I would go to work. And I would tear up sometimes at work. And then I'd come home and cry again. This feeling of feeling not good enough that I had no idea was running my show was woken up in me and I was completely shocked. So that unworthiness thing is something that we never want to look at and kind of sits back here. And that was when I was in my early 30s. And I'm a little bit older now. And as you know, I've worked in to coach for over 13 years and as a physician prior to that, and yoga teacher prior to that, and what I've discovered is everyone has it. It might sound silly, you probably are like yeah, Divi everyone has it. I didn't know that. And I also didn't know that everyone has it to a large degree. But how it shows up for each person is different for somebody else or unworthiness. voice in their head might make them work 900 hours a day. Because of the unconscious worthiness, they might think they have to pick up 70 shifts a week. And other people, the person who feels unworthy might show up in a different way that they currently are working in a job that doesn't serve them. Somebody else's unworthiness caused them to be morbidly obese. Somebody else's worthiness could cause them to be bone skin anorexic. Another person who feels unworthy might cause them to have multiple affairs. So what I'm trying to show you is this unworthiness dialog shows up in so many different ways in our lives, not just in one. And yes, I've seen the unworthiness thing be a big part of illnesses, massive part of illnesses, what to actually do with it. So the unworthiness thing then leads to shame and guilt, which I will get to. But I would love you to know before you even get to shame and guilt that that's you have it if you have shame and guilt, you haven't worthy, that's just accept it. The next thing I want you to know, take a breath is that there's actually two parts of us. And you may have heard me say this before, we have the Spirit, then we have the ego. But the spirit is your true essence.

Dr. Divi 06:10
The ego is what of course miracles calls the false reality of who you are. And you're like, Yeah, sure. Did he prove it to me? So yeah, let's prove it to you. Have you ever gone to a yoga class and felt better after? Have you ever thought sat and meditated and felt better after? Have you ever had your mind spinning and go shoot a hoop or go for a run and felt better after? Have you ever gone in nature and felt better after a while? You're like, yeah, Divi. Yeah, whatever nature shooting the hoop, whatever that's going to happen? Because the serotonin, no, no, no. Sure. Serotonin, sure, dopamine, all those great things. The reason those hormones work, is because this other party called your spirit actually gets active in your body. And then that gets a bit bigger and the ego, it's a bit quieter, you probably have had the experience that you're like spinning in your mind, and you scroll social media, and you found a post and it just like, calms you down. Or you listen to podcast, and it literally changes how you think that is very common. How is that? Because that social media posts that podcast and wakes up our true self, which is our spirit. Here's the other thing that's hard for us to understand. Is that essentially your true essence. That is the party that has unlimited power, unlimited wealth, infinitely capable, infinite potential. You've got it all. You've got it all. And the ego is a separate itself. Who doesn't believe you have that? The ego is the party who's like, Nope, you're not that. The ego when it says work harder. The egos the false self that says you're not spirit. That's basically the ego. And the gods million ways to say it to you. But because nature meditation, yoga, going for a workout actually help makes you start to realize that there is Spirit inside of you. It is understanding that you have the capability to connect with a truth that is outside your mind. A truth that is in your heart, a truth that's in your soul. And

Dr. Divi 08:18
I've said this before in other podcasts, but if the word spirit bothers you change to love, I might use the word love God, Spirit, the divine, the universe interchangeably. But love spirit, the divine loves you unconditionally, for to the moon and back. And in your spirit self, you are completely lovable, Unbeliev, powerful, and truly love and there's no one in your life, that spirit does not love. And that might sound hard for you to understand. But there is no one in your life that spirit does not love. The ego, on the other hand, is got other stories. So when you start to understand that there's two parts of you, then you can start to understand that the part of you that thinks you're not worthy is the ego. And that is it. It is really that simple. It is the ego is not even a real thing. Your heart is a real thing.

Dr. Divi 09:09
The heart energy has been studied by Heart Math, the heart is a real thing. Egos aren't really real. The ego is a mental construct. So you have these two parts inside of you the ego and spirit and the egos job is to block the spirit. And that's it. But the spirit is actually louder than the than the ego. But you have to get to know the ego. And that's really the key. So if you have this unworthiness conversation in your brain, you have to ask yourself, Who am I identifying apps? Okay, so I'm going to show you three different pie charts because if you don't know I'm incredibly visual. And I know a lot of podcast listeners are just the listen to this in a car for driving, you don't see the visual. If you're watching us on YouTube, you're going to see the visual. So I'm going to show you three different visuals. And three ways of identifying yourself for the first visual is essential right now if you're listening to this, I'm trying to pie chart. And I want you to imagine a pie chart with one, like a pizza pizza pie chart. But only one piece of the pizza is highlighted.

Dr. Divi 10:08
The whole pizza that's not cut left, describe that as the ego and the one piece of pizza is spirit. So when you're more in the ego more in fear more in overwhelm, or an anger more in blame, you're more apt the bigger pie piece, that's all spirit is there, but it's a tiny little piece. But it doesn't go away. You will never ever, ever, ever, ever be completely ego ever, ever. Because as long as you can breathe in your heartbeat spirits inside you. So there's one picture that I'm showing on the screen, where the majority of it is the ego now here's the deal is I can flip that is I can make the majority spirits. So I've scroll down you can see in this picture, spirits bigger than the ego. So in this I didn't color coded correctly, but that's okay. Spirit is the bigger, bigger piece of the pie. And the ego is a smaller piece of the pie. So that's possible. And in this picture, we're spirits, the bigger piece the egos the very tiny treats a piece. When you're feeling like this, you're holding more love. You're holding more space, you're more expensive. Now, but who are you truly the ego doesn't exist, that little piece of pie doesn't exist. So my last picture who you truly are the entire pizza pie. You're just spirit. So close your eyes if you can for a minute. Take a few breaths. Imagine a pizza pie that was only spirit, all your spirit. There's no little piece in there that says you're the ego you are only spirit. You're only love. Your only connection you're our only hope your own peace. So three really simple steps to start to unravel. Unravel unworthiness. Number one identify which pie piece which pie chart Am I looking at? am I more in the ego and Spirit is here, but it's just tinier? My Morin spirit, but I know that you go there because it's gonna come and tell you to be scared. Oh, my own spirit. How do you identify, and the more you identify in spirit, hey, the easier it gets step one, what pi piece I am.

Dr. Divi 12:01
Step two, forgive yourself for ever thinking that you are separate from spirit forgive yourself. Because there is a massive energy that runs through your body. There's an energy that runs me, there's an energy that is who I am not just this crazy concoction ego part of me. And the third part of it is practice seeing spirit and others. So I walk around some days I walk around, I look at people I go, that person's love, that person's love that person's love. Or I sometimes say it differently. That person is a child of God, that person is a child of God, but person is a child of God. You've ever seen the infinity sign, what I do to anybody else I do to myself, if I see you as the divine, I see me as my divine. If I see you as love, I see me as love. It's the more I do it out more comes back to me. So practicing what pashapour And I talked about forgiveness, and then also like, practice it and I'm going to add a couple other tools to this list. Never make your pie piece wrong. So yesterday, the ego for me with screaming and resentment and anger. But I knew well it was happening. I was like, Okay, this is just happening. I don't have to identify it. But I let myself feel it. And I could see it was happening. And the abraham hicks work. They call that step five moment, but if you don't know what that is, don't worry about it. I was just seeing Oh, yeah, there's a part of me. What a lot of us do is we look at the ego and go okay, let's try to get rid of it. That's impossible. Just know it's there. And just look at it go. Yeah, there you are. And the more you see yourself as the spirit, the more the pie gets taken over. If you acknowledge that it's there, it's not going to control you don't ignore it. And then again, forgiveness, forgiveness for that piece for forgetting that spirit. That's how I work with an earthiness. Now really quickly, not quickly, Will Dr guilt and shame. So guilt and shame is only there if you're identifying as the ego. I'll say that 10 more times, guilt and shame is only there if you identify as the separate itself. So only feel shameful that I've done something wrong. Oh my God, I'm such a bad version of identifies the ego. And I'm gonna come back to that in a minute, just you know. And same with guilt. I'm a bad mother because I'm not home with my child who am identifying as I wasn't identifying as a separate itself, not knowing in this moment, my heart, which is my spirit, can send infinite love to my son all the time.

Dr. Divi 14:18
I don't really physically there. I can send that love. But the more we're addicted to the ego, the more that guilt is going to come in. So if you've got a lot of guilt and shame, that should tell you right there that you're identified as a separate self. And that's really depressed, a lot of forgiveness to say, Okay, now, identify this and reframe those thoughts that make you feel guilty. Because guilt is just an addiction. It's an addiction to unworthy. It's an addiction to putting yourself down. It's an addiction to not seeing yourself as the true, Higher Self, the Divine Child of God that you're meant to be. Take a few breaths with that. It's just an addiction to a thought process. Last few things I'll say when it comes to shame because I know when I teach Just people go, but yeah, Divya if I, if I give up my shame that I'm going to be a bad person and cut people off in traffic, actually not true. If you identify a spirit and identify as love, human nature, when it comes to just being in spirit, you'll only be of love to each other. You right you won't do those things that you're afraid of doing. You will be love with each other. If you identify in love, everything starts to change. So don't worry about you know, not studying and not doing something right if you decide not to fight with the shame, and fat,human nature is such that you will do loving things do kind things. So, just something to play with. Take a second, close your eyes and take a few breaths.

Dr. Divi 15:54
Remembering that shame, guilt and unworthiness is a choice. Playing with those pie charts, identifying yourself as the divine, more and more and more. I will see you super soon sending you lots of love. And thank you for listening to the podcast. If you haven't already subscribed, hit subscribe. And feel free to send me some questions to easy to [email protected] that helps me create more content that I've got so much content from the 1000s and 1000s of clients I've worked with big love

Dr. Divi 16:28
thank you so much for joining me this podcast isn't clarity, it is such a joy, pleasure and honor to be in your living room. But I would love as if you follow me on Instagram, Dr. Di VI or go to my website, Dr. Di vi.com or write a review that would be even more amazing. Thank you. Do you really enjoyed this podcast, feel free to share it with friends family, Tom to follow me. Because I think the more of us that listen to the fact that we each of us can start to shift each of us can shift mental things, emotional things spiritual shift, to shift our daily reality when more and more of us do it. We get a better planet, we get more love, we get more happiness, we get more joy.

Dr. Divi 17:08
So I'd love it. If you followed I'd love to if you if you share this because it would be such a joy and an honor. And again, if you have a question, guess what I'm here for you. Send me an email ease into [email protected]. And as they come in, I will answer them in podcasts that are subsequent whether it be your boss, your relationship, your husband, whatever. That's what I'm here for. Because the more of us that learn really simple mental techniques, really simple spiritual techniques. We change the physical reality we live in. Pretty soon we have more peace, more ease more joy trickling across the whole world. Remember, there's a spiritual solution for every problem. Thank you for joining me namaste